Kristy Dorminy

Sounded like they all had a fun time!

Last Junior Prom✅

Molly had an amazing opportunity to sing a song in convocation at Liberty University. She wrote it after hearing a sermon by Josh Rutledge from 1 John. I was so happy I could be there to hear her and see her. She did great! It’s a powerful song, and I’m so proud of her. Here is the link. She sings at the beginning.

https://watch.liberty.edu/playlist/dedicated/82178501/1_npaqvv7z/1_rg11lvzm

I loved sitting with Ruby. She was a proud sister, and I was so proud of her too.

I was listening to an Active Listening Prayer podcast called The Collaboratory. She was teaching on who God says I am and how knowing Who God is helps me be confident in who He made me to be. She warned against the lies of the enemy that try to discourage.

She asked the listener to imagine we were in our favorite spot and Jesus was there. She led us, in our imaginations, to write down a lie we have believed about ourself. I scribbled on my torn sheet of paper I pulled from my imaginary pocket—“Just a Mom.”

She invited us to give the paper to Jesus. “What does He do with it?”she asked.

She gave options of what He might do with it—maybe He doesn’t even look at it, maybe He throws it in a nearby fire or maybe He swallows it! But before she could even offer these suggestions, I had a clear picture of what He did with my lie that I was “just a mom.” As soon as I handed Jesus the paper, He turned it into balloons that spelled out JUST A MOM. Each letter large and shiny and dancing in the sky.

This was a celebration in His eyes. To say no to other pursuits, other people, and other ways of spending my days and years. Saying yes to three little precious people for many days that have turned into years. Little people who have turned into young adults.

I am grateful to God for the ability to stay at home, the husband who has been only supportive of my role, and the time I’ve had with my kids. And I’m especially grateful for the party balloons Jesus made for me for being “Just a Mom.” I’ll never hear those words the same again.

So this unpacking from the beach all that The Lord packed in my heart has taken longer than I anticipated. Life is full! What can I say?

But if you remember, I was reading Psalm 139 everyday and everyday it seemed a different section stood out to me. I’m choosing to combine the last two days for fear I may not wrap this in a timely fashion.

In Sarah Hagerty’s book, The Gift of Limitations, she shares that the average human has about 6,000 thoughts a day. Now that did not surprise me one bit. My mind is constantly thinking something. It can be exhausting.

Psalm 139:17-18a says, “How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How vast is the sum of them. If I should count them, they would outnumber the sand.”

I asked the Lord to help me understand this verse more as I went to spend a day on the beach with more sand than any human could count. And I asked Him to help me think about things the way He thinks about things. I asked Him for wisdom from Him to be shared with me in many different areas of my life.

And then the next day, no matter how much I really didn’t want to focus on these next verses, I just had a hunch the Lord might bring my attention to them.

“I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are Your works and my soul knows it very well.”

What Christian girl hasn’t at some point in her life written this verse on an index card and taped it to her mirror? The mirror has oftentimes been a bit of a war zone of the mind—thoughts assail me. I carve my shape up, thinking smaller thighs are the key to happiness. Nowadays, it’s embracing a new wrinkle or sun spot on my face and wishing any one of the twelve anti-aging bottles actually would prove true.

The scripture goes on, “My frame was not hidden from You when I was made in secret and skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth.”

My frame—the very frame I often despise was made by God with skill. He put my body together just as it is. And that is a very good thing.

So on this morning at the beach while I walked along the shore and looked at all of those little pieces of sand, I asked God to help me think about my body the way He thinks about it. And I thanked God for my strong legs that were carrying me down the beach at that very moment. The way they allowed me to squat down to pick up sea shells. It felt good and right to take in this moment and these thoughts—to be grateful for my legs, the very part of my body I’ve spent lots of time wishing were different.

Then, later in the day, Mack took a photo of Josh and me, and I didn’t delete it upon first glance of my legs. I paused and thanked God for these exact legs and all they’ve walked me through in this life.

And I rolled over these verses from psalm 139–I am fearfully and wonderfully made! And how vast are the thoughts of God unto me! His works are wonderful.

I asked the Lord to keep helping me think His thoughts on all things…even my good frame He made for me.

When Mack was a toddler, he loved to hide and be found by Josh. At bedtime we would all go to the girls’ room first and tuck them in, talk some and pray and play around. Then, I’d tell Mack it was time to go to his room. He knew what that meant. We would walk down the hall, leaving Josh safely behind us. We would open the closet door and sit on the floor of the closet in the dark, as quietly as a toddler could be. He would put his chubby little hand over his mouth and softly giggle as he heard Josh walking towards the room. Josh would “look all around for us,” but always had such trouble finding us. He’d look behind the curtains. He’d look in the crib, all the time asking where we were and all the time Mack would smile so big at me. He thought we were really getting dad good. But then, inevitably, Josh would open the closet door in amazement and see us. His searching finally paid off, and we would laugh and laugh. Both of us were happy that he searched and found us.

All humans have a deep desire to be seen and known.

During my psalm 139 reading last week, my eyes were opened in a fresh way to the very first verse, “O, Lord, You have searched me and known me.”

To search me would mean God’s eyes were on me. He sees me. And God knows me better than I know myself.

This seems so elementary, so basic. Yet, on day three of reading this familiar chapter, I was comforted by this short, yet meaningful, line.

I asked God to make me aware of His searching of my heart. Of His knowing me better than anyone else. And to find comfort in both of those.

It was a good day. It prepared me for the rest of the week….

Though I’ve finally gotten a handle on the literal unpacking from our beach trip, there are still spiritual bags to unpack. “Brushes with God change us,” as Sara Hagerty writes in her latest book, The Gift of Limitations: finding beauty in your boundaries. These moments are worth looking back on. I share them in hopes of encouraging you in your own walk with the Lord.

The message of Sara’s book hit so close to home. I, too, have been on a journey of embracing my own limitations, of bumping up against my own boundary lines. Each time this happens, I’m graciously met with the presence of God. His rod and staff, guiding me. In conjunction with reading this book, I was also reading Psalm 139 each morning—prompted by the Lord to do this, a brush with God I didn’t recognize until I was at the beach.

On Tuesday morning when I “sat on the steps of my soul in the deep place where nobody goes,” as Jill Briscoe so beautifully puts it, my mind was drawn to the subtitle of Psalm 139 in my Bible —“God’s Omnipresence and Omniscience.” He is everywhere and knows all things. And quite the opposite is true of me. I sat in one little bedroom in a beach house on the coast of South Carolina. I know so very little.

Verses 4-6 particularly has my attention.

Even before there is a word on my tongue, Behold, O Lord, You know it all. You have enclosed me behind and before and laid Your hand upon me [my words:do you hear the boundaries around you that is God Himself?). Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is too high, I cannot attain to it.”

I’ve read these words many times before, but more than ever I saw His limitlessness. And I saw my limitedness.

The theme of Sara’s book helped me consider afresh the comfort I can experience when I acknowledge and rest in my limits. Not trying to fight for more or struggle to be more, do more. But instead to take a moment and thank God for the boundaries He has put around my life. As Sarah wrote, “God often gives us limits to grow us.”

Like a seed, limited and confined to its shell, it must surrender in death, buried in the soil, dependent on what only God can do, before there is life and fruit again.

John 12:24 “Very truly I tell you, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.”

Praying that we can be grateful for our limitations and be drawn closer to our limitless God. He is all we need. Why would we try to jump our God-given fence or move our God-given boundary lines in our own strength?

“The Lord is the portion of my inheritance and my cup; You support my lot. The lines have fallen to me in pleasant places; Indeed my heritage is beautiful to me. I will bless the Lord who has counseled me; Indeed my mind instructs me in the night. I have set the Lord continually before me; Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. Therefore my heart is glad and my glory rejoices; my flesh also will dwell securely. For You will not abandon my soul to Sheol; Nor will You allow Your Holy One to undergo decay.

You will make known to me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; In Your right hand there are pleasures forever.”

Psalm 16:5–11

How about a few photos of our Spring Break trip? It was such a fun week on Edisto Island with Ruby, Molly and some of their awesome college friends! Knowing the girls were going to be gone all summer and we wouldn’t be able to have a family vacation, I thought Spring Break would be a great time to get away. Josh and Mack got to join us for the second half, which was a blessing.

And these young adults were so fun and so enjoyable to be around. They seemed to have a great time. I know I did!

Some of the best times were around the table while we ate together.

We had Mexican one night. We ordered pizza another night and had lasagna and Caesar salad one evening. They went out a couple of times. And we grilled hamburgers and hot dogs. There were lots of eggs for breakfast. One morning included pancakes and bacon. Most mornings everyone made their own breakfast. I did manage to cook some sausage balls while we were there too! Lots and lots of food. And lots of talking. I loved learning more about each one of them and watching them interact. They were a great group and I loved being with them!

Many days were spent at the beach, which is my most favorite thing ever in the world.

More pictures and blogs to come as I keep unpacking but there’s no one else I’d rather be living this life with than Josh. He is so generous to let me make this reservation and get all these folks under one roof. He is just the best. I love him so! (Even though he says we won’t be retiring at the beach one day.🤣)

Unpacking from the beach involves dirty clothes, putting away bathing suits and beach towels, and, for me anyway, washing and drying the plethora of seashells I gathered as I strolled the morning shore.

After the kindness of the Lord this week, I also want to unpack all that I gleaned from my time with Him.

A week at the beach holds many opportunities to pay attention to the Lord in ways much different than home in the city of Charlotte where days are filled with responsibilities and daily troubles. Sometimes a new location heightens your sensitivities.

I sensed the Lord wanting me to read Psalm 139 each day of my trip, so that was my plan. But on the first morning, before I could get to the familiar chapter, I was captured by an article entitled, “Am I a Quarrelsome Wife?” I read through the article, feeling quite convicted. Then, this sentence stopped me—“And Gillian stood in the middle of it all, unhappily carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders.” And then this addition, “…her presence an inhospitable place.”

Ouch.

During my morning walk, I asked God to forgive me for being so ridiculous to think I could carry the weight of the world on my shoulders, yet confessing it oftentimes all feels like a bit much. But He is the only One able to carry the world, of this much I know in my head. I just feel like He may be too busy so I must carry my little world on my shoulders in the meantime.

This attitude has tainted my good intentions far too many times when I have meant well and wanted to serve and help and plan….and also desired recognition for my hard work and I wanted appreciation…lots and lots of appreciation. To live with someone like this—who feels like they’re doing it all (I’m not tho. Not even close) and is bitter about it (I sometimes am), can be as confusing as a spring day when the sun is shining and warm, then it is hidden by clouds and the air is chilly and harsh. So confusing and frustrating.

I had some dialogue with God:

O, Lord, forgive me for “curving life in on myself.” I am asking You to make me into a reverent, gentle, thoughtful, grateful, hopeful, generous woman of God. I do sense in many ways I’ve embraced my limitations, my fence, my boundary lines. It’s been quite the journey to get here. I am Josh’s wife—supporting him and enabling him to soar in work and at home. I’m Ruby, Molly and Mack’s mom—giving up pursuing any outside career for pouring myself into motherhood and home. I’ve accepted the truth that you cannot have it all, despite what our culture says. Someone has had to think about what’s for dinner every night for 23+ years and that someone has been me.

I sensed a few thoughts from God: Don’t resent this. Be humbled and honored that you’ve been the leader of some of the most important building blocks of your family. Dinner time feeds more than bellies.

Lord, make me a grateful woman.

Then, as I was walking back towards the beach house, I started humming, “He’s got the whole world in His hands; He’s got the whole world in His hands….”, and I felt the weight of the world lift off my shoulders.

He is limitless. I am limited. He knows all. I don’t. There’s freedom to be had when we walk in these truths and don’t feel like we have to have it all figured out. He’s got it all in His hands. We can rest like a child in His lap.

Conversation is defined as “a talk, especially an informal one, between two or more people, in which news and ideas are exchanged.”

Have you ever been with someone and never had a chance to speak?

I mean, I’m all for being a good listener and asking good questions. But being with someone, say, on a walk or over coffee, and assuming their life isn’t falling apart, wherein it’s ok if they just vent the whole time, then wouldn’t it NOT be a conversation if you never get to say a word? It would at least be extremely one-sided. The person who has listened and never had a chance to speak into the conversation would likely feel lonely and even odd as they leave the time wondering—what just happened?

This idea came to me as I heard lyrics from a song about prayer:

“Spirit I will wait on You. In silence I am listening. For what’s a conversation if You have no time to speak? So Lord I will be still for You made my souls to rest. And there you give me pictures of the wonders up ahead.”

I was reminded that silence and listening are both vital to conversing with God. So often we just say what we need to say or, as I recently read, “We worry in the general direction of God” and then go on our merry way. But what about listening? What about leaning in to ask, “What would you like to say to me, God?”

I did that this afternoon and clearly I knew to turn to Psalm 139. Such a word from God to me.

Kristy, I made you. I formed you in your mother’s womb. Yes, your mother who is no longer with you on earth. I am before you, behind you, and My hand is on your life. I am with you always and everywhere. No matter how dark the world seems, with Me there is light. There’s been a lot of death from wars and disease and even young people you know—remember, in My book were written all the days that were ordained for you. Even before there was one of them! You can trust Me. I will lead you in the everlasting way. Stay close to Me. Don’t run from Me. Lean in and trust.

I share this to encourage you to pour out your heart to God. He hears! AND to listen. His voice is precious. His Word is a treasure. Search it. Find what He is saying to you today. 💗

The year is just ticking along! I cannot believe we are nearing the end of February. If I’m honest, I’d hoped the year would be restful and calm, but that has not been true at all. Life is full. There have been fun moments and there have been hard moments. There are so many teaching moments with our kids. I’m not sure if we are getting old and running out of energy for this or if we feel this crunch on time as we feel our window of training is quickly closing for each of the kids. But these life lesson talks exhaust me. There are so many things I feel like they should have gotten by now.

And truth be told, I feel the same way about my own self. So many moments lately that I am disappointed in my response or frustrated with my lack of self control or baffled that I still struggle in the same area. I think, “Shouldn’t I have gotten this by now?!?!!??”

When I was talking with The Lord about a failure of mine just this morning, I sensed Him say to my heart—“You are forgiven.” It was so sweet to feel His forgiveness. To roll those words over my heart and mind and to sit in His love. He’s not shaking His head at me. He’s not berating me with sarcastic words. He isn’t put out with me. He is steady and strong and forgiving. He doesn’t run away from me and all my issues. I’m so grateful.

So as this year rocks along, I hope I’ll be aware of God’s grace and patience with me. And in turn, I hope I will give my kids more grace and patience. That’s usually how it works.

So how about some photos and videos of the last few weeks?

We put out nearly 25 yards of mulch and it about killed my back.

Speaking of my back—I am still working out and proud of my consistency and progress!

I take way too many photos of Rolo. We love her to pieces.

I was so glad to see them. And sad to see them go. It was just too rushed. But spring break is almost here!!! Super excited for some beach time with them and some of their friends.

Ok, that’s all I’ve got for this little February update. Hope you’re enjoying life wherever you are! ❤️