When Rolo was having some hormonal issues last year, it became quite apparent she and I were walking similar paths in mid-life. I didn’t think about this when we got her back in 2017, but as dog years go, here we both are in mid-life. She has moved a little faster than me in getting here, but recently our similarities were on full display.
The girls came home from college graduation and brought all of those blasted blue bags filled to the brim with all manner of stuff. Stuff, stuff, and more stuff. I had the pleasure of helping them go through every.single.bag. We had to decide if it was something to keep, pack for their next adventure, donate or trash. And I am not sure I can properly tell you how miserable it is to go through someone else’s stuff.
Ruby slept downstairs for a while. Mack and Molly were upstairs. Then, Molly left and Ruby moved upstairs. They stay up later than we do. They move around a lot and shower at oddly late hours. They come and go on no set routine. Or at least no set routine of mine or Rolo’s.
We love having the kids back under our roof. It’s fun and lively. There is laughter and extra shoes laying around. Extra cars in the driveway. More laundry piles and later nights.
It’s wonderful.
It’s also exhausting.
So Rolo was quite anxious. She was so happy they were here. She gets the zoomies when they pull up. She seems to enjoy them at first. Then, she started pacing and hiding and panting. At bedtime we would get her bed ready, turn off the lights or tell the kids to turn off the lights when they were ready to go to bed, and then we would go to bed. Well, Rolo was all messed up. She would huff and puff in annoyance when they stayed up watching a movie. Then, she would go upstairs to Molly’s room, then downstairs to her bed, then back upstairs to Mack’s room. Then back down. She would convince Molly she needed to go out and get a treat in the middle of the night. We never take her out in the middle of the night. Ruby blocked the stairs to keep Rolo in her own area, but Rolo wasn’t having it. She would bark and cry and whine horribly. This went on night after night. I tried calming treats. I walked her in the evening to try and tire her out. Nothing was working.
So I asked the World Wide Web what the heck to do with this dog! And it started becoming clearer that Rolo and I are the same. From the internet: “Dogs are remarkably good at sensing household energy. She may pick up on all the new activity and emotion and is responding by staying on high alert.” Huh! Me, too!!!
Rolo’s breed is highly people-oriented. So at first she’s like, “Yay! All my people are together again!” Same, Rolo, same.
Rolo also thrives on predictability. She operates best when life feels orderly and predictable. Same, Rolo, same.
Rolo feels responsible for everyone. She likes when her pack is together, so when they’re scattered all over the house, Rolo is on high-alert to make sure everyone is ok. Same, Rolo. Same.
Rolo’s age is also now a factor. Routines are comforting. Change feels bigger than it is. Recovery from excitement takes much longer than it used to.
Same, Rolo. Same!
I was feeling the weight of all of the kids back under the same roof. More groceries. More schedules. More laundry. More conversations. More decisions. More people I love scattered between bedrooms and future plans. My heart was stretched—in a good way, but my nervous system sort of needed some room to breathe.
I love the togetherness. I do! And I crave my quiet routines. Both can be true.
And now Ruby is in Tennessee. Molly is in South Carolina. Mack is currently out of town.
Rolo has stopped pacing and checking every bedroom. I have gotten the house back in order as well as gotten some extra rest.
And I miss them terribly.
I rearrange my schedule, my routines, my home, my expectations and my heart for the kids. I love them. And love usually disrupts.
Rolo doesn’t understand internships or college graduations. She doesn’t realize the girls are gone for quite a while now—not even sure how long. And because Mack likes to annoy Rolo on purpose, she doesn’t worry over him like she does the girls.
Rolo just knows her people came home, but now they left again.
Same, Rolo. Same.





































































































































































